Cowboy Down Low

Back in September, a local school had one of its donors take back a 3 million dollar pledge because the short story "Brokeback Mountain" was on the reading list, and now the movie based on the short story is all over the news winning awards. I wanted to see what all the hubbub was about so I went to see Brokeback Mountain this week. I thought it would be an easy task, but the men in my life refused to go with me. They didn't want to see a gay-man movie, it seemed. Okay, now I was really intrigued.
I went in the middle of the afternoon and thought it would be nice and quiet, but I was mistaken. Just as I got out of my car, a bus from a senior citizen retirement village pulled up. Turned out they all wanted to see Brokeback, too. Fortunately I was able to by pass the ticket wondow and the line because I had Fandangoed my ticket, and I slid into my seat just as the lights dimmed.
Let me first say that the movie was a wonderful love story. It was like Bridges of Madison County, but with two men . That doesn't mean I don't have questions.
Two cowboys go out on the range for a season to watch the sheep. These are straight men, right? Well, one cold and drunken night, they end up spooning in a tent, and all hell lets loose. Okay, there are definitely some men out there who, when freezing to death, would gladly spoon another man, but I'd bet that most men faced with that situation wouldn't do that. If they had to share a sleeping bag or a tent, they would sleep head to toe, or just suck it up and be cold. Women can generally be intimate like that, but most straight men?
Then, after they tousled for awhile about who was going to be on top and had man-sex, the next day one announced, "I ain't no queer." Sure, you ain't.
They go home to their lives and get married and after a few years go by and they can't stop thinking about each other, one looks the other up. They get together and embrace and of course, they kiss. It was a very manly kiss.
While this was happening, the wife sees them. And she says nothing. She lives with his secret for years. Lets her husband and his "fishing buddy" go off every three months or so and "fish" even though he never brings home any fish and barely pays the bills. Uh-huh. Now, see, if that woman had been a sister-girl, she would have started yelling at the top of her lungs and thrown all kinds of pots, pans and anything else that wasn't tied down, packed up her stuff and left with her kids. Then she would have told anyone that would listen that her ex-man had been on the down low.
The lived like that until one of the men died, about twenty years. It made me think about what I would or wouldn't do for love. One of the men was driving over eight hours to see his lover. He waited for all of his life, hoping that the other man would come around.
Don't know many women that would do that.
But I don't know many men that would do that for a woman either.
And not one senior citizen ran screaming from the theater.

Comments

Anonymous said…
it was a beautiful movie when you look at all the emotions that came on-screen (but could have done w/o the mounting, and i thought they kissed more like primal animals, but i guess that might be how men do it).

i do disagree w/ your last two lines of your blog. too many women take too much crap and remain in relationships with men they love. i think it is the same (if not worse) as traveling for hours on end to see a lover or waiting your whole life for love.

love has no rules. it happens when we least expect it, often when we don't want it, many times when we can't handle it. it often times scares you, surprises you, shakes you down to your very core. gay, straight, bi, tri, on the "DL" or whatever way you look at it, people do what they must to make and the keep connections they need to make thier lives whole.

c/c
Anonymous said…
I can't get anyone to go see Brokeback mountain with me either. I guess I will have to go alone too.
Anonymous said…
I can't get anyone to go see Brokeback mountain with me either. I guess I will have to go alone too.
Anonymous said…
...so what is the big deal? are these folks who don't want to see this movie afraid that seeing it will make them gay? are they afraid of a different love story? or is it just the same general reaction you get for any other "chick-flick"? And if the last one is the case, what would you typically do? If you can't get someone to watch Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants with you, they won't do Brokeback Mountain. But if you can, what would be the barrier?
still grooven said…
I have a firm belief that many times, phobics are born of those who have unresolved feelings about the thing they have conjured fear about. So all of these people who are afraid to see this beautiful love story, I might challenge, have unresolved issues with their own sexuality. So much of our lives revolve around what we want other people to believe r not believe about us. The perceptions that people so righteously hold up often have very little to do with who they really are. (blah, blah, blah.) and why when men and women do it, it’s sexy and “doggy style” but when men do it it’s “mounting.” Sure it looks primal animal lust but these are men who live their regular lives (and have been socialized as) straight cowboys (the manliest of all men, right?). anyway, I really liked the movie on so many levels. all of the things it accomplished and it rejected in it’s mere existence. Fortunately the list of my liberal, loving minded friends is long and wide. My problem was going to see it with someone who hadn’t already seen it.
Anonymous said…
I know I'm a little late with my comment but oh well. But it amazes me how many times guys have been labeled phobic or worse for not wanting to go see Brokeback(The title alone is enuff to scare most guys).Ladies please ease up on us.

For the record, us not wanting see this movie doesn't have anything to do with some arm chair pshyco analysis involving latent sexual tendencies or issues. Please let that go. I'll tell you why if you can handle the truth. Come close to the monitor 'cause here it is: maybe men don't want to see this movie because...wait for it.....we don't want to see the movie--deep huh?! Yes it is that simple.

Every movie doesn't appeal to everyone.Joel Seigel(who obviously like every movie that comes out), Ebert&Roeper and any of those other cats don't always know what h#ll they're talking about!Here's one y'all ladies. Go see Something New with Sanaa Lathan(with her foine self)this weekend and let me know what you think.I've been hearing flack already about this one. This is your Brokeback. And I'm thru!! PS:the brothers won't be seeing that one either.

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