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Showing posts from January, 2015

Teen Alien Warp Signature Vapors

My home was visited by aliens last night. I recognized their warp signature from the last time they came to visit and abduct my sweet little girl to take her off to the planet Teen. Just like then, they left an evil imposter in her place. Although the imposters they left look like my children, they do not act like those sweet urchins that would listen to me and laugh with me and smell my hair lovingly when they were sleepy. Instead, these creatures are surly things that ignore my wardrobe advice and will occasionally talk back to me. Just like last time, the signs are there that the imposters have arrived. For Midime, she morphed from a sweet girl that wanted lime green walls and billowy curtains in her room, to one that leaves her bathroom a mess. No, scratch that, to a creature whose bathroom looks like Mogadishu after an air raid. I STILL have to deal with that.       This time, the aliens took Minime. She was my sweet baby that always took my side and would love to just be in…

Finding Humor in Your Day/Not screaming about shit

Finding the humor in your day can keep you sane. I had to find humor in mine this morning. I'm now doing two-a-day workouts. That means I am splitting my gym time, separating the cardio and the weight workouts. Going to the gym before works requires a lot of extra effort if you 're a girl. That means pre-thinking what you are going to wear and giving up the time spent in your closet changing your outfit. It means you have to commit to your clothes without trying two different shirts or three different pair of shoes. It also means you can't forget anything..shampoo, conditioner, hair gel, makeup and associated brushes, jewelry...shoes...and underwear. Let's not forget that last one. I tried, at first, to get up and get things ready, but that didn't work too well. I had a day where I forgot proper bottoms, so now, I have taken to getting EVRYTHING ready the night before. This is HUGE for someone who packs for a flight an hour before they have to leave for the airpo…