Showing posts from September, 2006

Flying wthout Orgasm

Liquid ban on airline flights have been relaxed. Will never have to fly
without Orgasm again.

That was the content of a text message I received from a friend of mine yesterday. Although I knew what they were talking about, I still laughed. I recently took a flight, then at the airport, realized that I had left my favorite lip gloss in my purse and had not packed it. The name? Orgasm, by Bobbi Brown. I gave it to my friend and begged them to please drop it in the mail for me.
I'm so glad that dang ban has been lifted. Billy might be able to travel without lotions or creams, but ladies, think about how difficult this can be. I tried it.
Joe can leave home without lip gloss (hope he doesn't own any of Jane might be in trouble). For women though, we all know that there had been many a day when a touch of color or shine on your lips made you look better and hence be a little nicer. Imagine a world filled with women with ashy lips.

John can leave home without lotion and maybe u…

Speaking in Tongues

If you listen your kids will tell you what they really think.
One of mine told me this: "The babysitter is starting to talk on the phone while driving."
I paused a minute, remembering her calling me the minute she picked them up from school this past Friday. I was out of town on a Femme Fantastik Adventure.
"Are you sure she wasn't talking to me? " I said.
She cocked her head to the side and then answered. "No, she wasn't."
"How do you know?"
"I just know Mom. She was talking black."
Now what does she mean by that? Am I not black?

I said, "Really? How does one do that?"
She grinned. "You know what I mean, mom. The tone in your voice,Like when you talk to (Daddy's Mom) Grandma."

Now what does she mean by that?

"How do I talk to Grandma?"
"You know mom, Like when you and her say things like "That girl ain't got no money". Like that."
"I see. So how do I talk otherwise?"

On Ladies & Gentelmen (Guest Blogger)

It's time again for the male vioce to weigh in. This from a mysterious male guest blogger....
On ladies and gentlemen....
After reading your blog, I started to ponder a bit about what a gentle
is and does and conversely what a lady is and does (our what they should
do at least in today's day and time). Here are my views, interested in
what I'm missing or am wrong about.

Gentleman Rules
Seems to me that a gentleman must or should:
- walk a lady to her car anytime from dusk onward
- open doors when it makes sense to, but don't break your neck to do it
when it doesn't make sense
- take the hat off whenever inside no matter how bald or near bald you
are/are becoming
- look a lady in her eyes first....check the rest out later, but start
with her eyes because we are people first and animals second
- realize that women are not helpless, but appreciate being helped. Ask
if she needs help picking up the suitcase or grocery bag and let her
decide if she needs a stronger set of arms (if yo…

I usually don't blog about politics but....

Seems like anyone can run for Governor. Kinky Friedman is trying it in Texas. For those of you who don't know, he is a musician and he's runnoing on the Red Neck Ticket. Seems like Mr Kinky is a little Kinky, he's like animals better than he likes people, at least according to his campaign ad. His recent ad talks about none of these issues important to the folks of Texas and compares himself to "The Good Shepherd". He he has been quoted as calling Katrina Evacuees Thugs and Crackheads. Hmmm. What is Jesus-like about that? Talk aboout a stretch. What, exactly, does he know about running the state? What's that you say? Maybe not a whole lot? Seems like a good gig if you can get it.
Here's the commercial, see what you think.

The truism of the Southern Gentleman.

Last week I signed books at the Congressional Black caucus Convention In D.C. No pictures, because as usual, I forgot my clunker of a camera. The highlight of the event was not what I thought it would be, seeing Barack Obama (alas, I didn't get there, but I will fill you in on that later!), but it was being recognized.
Authors are people without faces (They just have words) and I was recognized not by a reader(well, I was, but that wasn't the thing), I was recognized by Thelma! YOu know, Bernadette Stanis, Thelma from Good Times. Let me just say, I googled her to figure out her birthday and sister is looking good! I want to be her when I grow up.
I left the convention center and thought I was headed to see Barack speak. I was feeling kinda paranoid so it was more like I was scurrying away, when all of a sudden, it hit me. I wasn't paranoid, someone was staring. I looked down at my shoes (they are always comforting, this time, a purplish Jimmy Choo sling back), pick…

Kindred Spirits Book Club in LA

Kindred Spirits Book Club Presents
The Femme Fantastik Tour
Saturday, September 23, 2006
2:00 to 5:00 PM
Hilton Burbank Airport
2500 N Hollywood Way
Burbank, CA 91505
Phone: (818) 843-6000
$35 donation per person - book includeda portion of proceeds will benefit the to the
AIM-IRS Los Angeles Chapter
The Bobby S. Wyche Scholarship Fund
For tickets please mail check or postal money order made payable to"Kindred Spirits Book Club"along with a self-addressed stamped envelope to:Kindred Spirits Book Club
Attention: Femme Fantastik Tour
11024 Balboa Blvd #634
Granada Hills, CA 91344-5007
For more information contact: Sharon Hollis at
Books available from Heritage Bookstore and More
Nina Foxx Just Short of Crazy
Carmen Green What A Fool Believes
Lori Bryant-Woolridge Hitts & Mrs.
ReShonda Tate Billingsley Help! I've Turned Into My Mother
Trisha Thomas Would I Lie To You

Good Malls and Well Water

Summer's over! Okay not really, but it is September. In case you don't know, even if Labor Day isn't on September 1, September doesn't start until after Labor Day (in my twisted mind). Labor Day means the end of Summer, except if you live in South Texas. In that case, what it means is that instead of damn hot we will just be hot with temps that hover in the high 90's.
This time of year I do miss the East Coast. I miss the leaves turning wonderful colors and drives just to see them turn. I miss the clothes. We just don't have a fall season here where you get to where the great clothes and boots are REALLY jiust for show. A few of us do try though, we go and get that "IT" outfit and sport it although we know we are really hot as hell in it. I never appreciated a good dress shield before. Opaque tights are supposed to be very in this year. That is funny when you live in no pantyhose land. If you live on the east coast you almost can't ima…