Things in the mirror are closer than they appear. Things on the Parisian landscape are further away than they appear. I know this now without a doubt. You see, someone thought it would be a good idea to walk to the Eiffel tower. It looks so big, how far away could it be, right? Oh, I'd say almost an hours walk. We walked and we walked and we walked some more and we still weren't there. It just didn't get any closer. I walked off all of my lunch wine and wasworking on my morning criossant before we got close. I mean, the durn thing was so far, we stopped in a park to rest. I stalled the kids. They were excited about the prospect of more stairs. I told them of the Parisian grass police and how it was illegal to walk on the grass in here. if you did, a silent alarm was set off at grass headquarters and the paddy wagon (or whatever its called here) would be on its way to swoop you up and spirit you away to the Bastille. "Will they behead you there, Mommy?"...