Vixen Chronicles

So far so good...on my get fit get fine plan. I started in January and have kept at it. After losing 35 lbs And maintaining lean muscle mass reasonably well, I am  within  4 lbs of my goal weight, and feel as if I am more than ready for the beach. There are several things that have helped me to stay focused on the prize. First, the hubster is right there with me, not just cheering me on, but participating as well. He's lost just as much as I have. Another is community. Yes, I do love my fitbit. There are many nights where I have gone out for a last run because I can't get less steps than so-and-so. So and so knows who they are. Next, my kids. Nothing feels better than having my teen tell me I'm fitter than her or my ass looks better than hers when she used to say things like, "mom, you look like you are pregnant" or "I like putting my head on your belly. It's like a pillow." Now her sideways compliments sound more like "Mom, your butt is finally...

Those of you that follow me know I embarked in a more healthy lifestyle at the beginning of the year. I've accomplished several goals and have set new ones. My workouts, for the most part, take place evenings, although I have been trying to do one on Friday morning before work. This is  really, really hard. Mornings are very full. I'm all about learning from other's mistakes, so I have worked through why this is hard to do for all of us. My reasons follow. 1. Forgetting of the underwear. This sucks. You think you packed it, but left it on the bed. Not good. In the movies, being au natural looks cool. Its not. Its uncomfortable. 2.You try to solve number one by leaving undies in the gym bag. But then you discover that you have used them all. Or they clash terribly with the rest of your undergarments. Foundations needs to feel fantastic, and this can ruin your day. Clashing undies means you blush when you walk around the lockerroom in them. And you will walk around in t...

I reposted an article that a friend of mine shared yesterday--about a woman trying to wax herself, and it reminded me a of a blog I wrote back in 2007--an account of me doing the very same thing! I have a ton of friends who can tell stories about the time they tried to save themselves 75 bucks by trying to remove their own hair. Most times, the outcome wasn't so good. After doing it myself for quite awhile, I decided to try various waxing salons. A few times, I might have been better off doing it myself. Back when I was at FDU, I read this piece (much revised) at a student workshop session, and watched as the men in the room cringed. This was something they could not imagine. One of my professors lived in Copenhagen, and after my session, we talked about how American women were obsessed with hair removal in a way that the women in Copenhagen were not. We preferred smoothness to hair everywhere, but that is all good. (He read a piece that same day that told of the inability to mictu...

Charlenne, The doctors say that it won’t be long now. Your son just called and told me. I have to say that I didn’t expect to be sucked down the long tunnel of dread, and I certainly didn’t expect the tears. I haven’t spoken to you in a month or so. That’s mainly my fault. Since I split with your son, I don’t call as much. I think it may have been a little uncomfortable for you, too, because you don’t call me either, not like at first. As young women, we are often told what type of relationship to expect with a mother-in-law, and unfortunately, we often believe it. That’s where we started, in that place that every mother-in-law-daughter-in-law dyad is supposed to begin, midway between disdain and respect and halfway to fear. Over time, we both figured that each was going to stick around awhile, so we had to get past the paper cuts and passive-aggressive behaviors that we inflicted on each other regularly. You would always be his mother and I would always be the mother of his children. ...

I'm really excited about this next book, A Letter for My Mother. This is an annthology of essays collected from my writer and film friends. It features work by many of the big names you know, writers such as Victoria Christopher Murray, Reshonda Tate Billingsley, Zane, Carmen Green, Tannanarive Due, plus some writers you may not have heard of. The book is due to be released in a few days, and because of the participatory nature of this project, I wanted to invite you, the reader to participate as well. So, from now until Mother's Day, I challenge you in the same way I challenged the writers that have contributed to this book. I will open my blog to your posts for that time period. Reach deep down and write your own letter to your mother or mother-figure in your life and tell them something you never could before. Mother-Daughter relationships aren't always pretty, but they almost always teach us something. What has your taught you? Tell us here. A few caveats: You have ...

     When we are young, our parents often tell us things that we don't understand or that make no sense to us until much later in life, things like anything worth doing is worth doing well, or nothing tastes as good as skinny feels. I confess that my parents didn't tell me that one, but I have learned it to be true over my 11 week long journey to fit.     I embarked on my new health challenge at the beginning of the year, and except for one lone glass of wine with friends, a planned one, I have stuck to it. I have not missed one of the 66 exercise sessions, or 11 dietitian appointments. I walked and run countless miles (unless you follow me on fitbit; the actual number is there for you to see and me to gloat over). I'm sure I have east coast friends who are staying up late because they are afraid that I have a three hour jump on them and might out step them when they sleep. (Girl, stop jogging in your 600 square foot apartment! You are disturbing the neighbors...

So You Want to Become a Writer: Tools of the Trade for Beginners You’ve decided that out of all the other professions you could choose, writing is right for you. You want to compose beautiful prose and enter the minds of your readers to enrich their imagination. But where do you start? What do you need? What are the best writers using to enhance their writing skills? In an age of endless technology, there are millions of online resources. But what some beginning writers forget about is the actual written word: books. There are many books out there that writers need to have. Now, let’s not rule out Kindle electronic books; just because there’s no paper doesn’t mean it’s not a real book. Also, think about the entire writing process. What do you need to start out? What’s your writing style? What do you need to give you that last push at the end to finish your novel? What do you need to market, promote, or publish your work? What writing contests are available for beginning writers? The...

Some days, Kids know how to make you scream. Or almost. They make you want to scream. Don't. Instead breathe in, then breathe out. Repeat. If I can get through mother-of-teendom doing this, it will work for you. My teen lost her wallet. That means, no school ID, no bus pass, no driving permit. Then, she followed that up by losing her glasses. Again. Breathe in, breath out. Repeat. I decided to go in to work late to get her a replacement permit. She shows up at my room, ready to go. or--(insert sound of screeching car here). Her mouth said she was ready to go to a place of business, but her clothing did not. She had on shorts that might have been panties, a shirt that bared her midriff, thigh high thick socks and  over the knee boots. Oh, an a hip length sweater over that. Did I mention it is winter? But the boots, they were slamming! Clearly, she got her shoe taste from her mama. I said, "Darling, we are going to two places of business, followed by lunch at my office. You ...

Read Northern Passion TODAY!

     My first memory as a child is dust and white, frilly socks. I can't remember people but I remember standing in the dust down south, and seeing my feet and those socks they put on very little girls, and being so little that I could very easily look UNDER the houses that were raised up on cinder blocks. I know now that I am remembering what used to be sharecroppers houses-turned black people's neighborhood. (I'm not that old).  I don't remember ever being in that place again.  The house changed when my grandmother moved.      My younger brother also has memories of that place. Interestingly enough, our memories are not the same, even though we are really close together. Maybe  he saw different things than I did. He told me his memories and now I would argue that his memories are so closely interwoven with mine that they all belong to me now. Mine also belong to him. These have created a new, bigger remembrance of tha...

I keep getting asked if what I write is real life.  I repeat-I’m not that interesting, but I have a heck of an imagination. Let’s talk Eastern Spice (Cynnamon Foster).  Of course, I am not a spy.  I am a writer.  I’m certainly not a spy that goes undercover in swingers clubs, but I did write about real places I have been in the book.  In fact, India and Japan are two of my favorites. I always knew my characters would end up in India.  I knew that before I had ever been or put one word on the page.  I was intrigued by a story that my husband found in the paper about a woman found dead in a hotel pool where he was staying in India. In the movie in my mind, of course it was a conspiracy.  I cooked up a story and started writing. Then I visited.  I got to drive through the countryside and exchange wedding vows at the Taj Mahal, and had to go back and re-write what I had written.  I wanted the details to be as real as possible, so m6 ch...

Every time I talk with Book clubs, I get asked if any of the things in my books are from life.  The answer is a definitive no…and yes. This question made me chuckle when I was writing Nina Foxx books, but as Cynnamon Foster, it makes me guffaw with laughter, because what they are really asking is if my sex life is as filled with adventure as Desiree’s or Seria’s.  Let me just say, I am wonderfully happy in that area, but no, I don’t write from my life, at least not in that sense. I actually do a lot of research—but not the way you might think.  The publisher supplied me with animated visual aids (very, very funny!).  I also read a lot of titles in the genre as well as watch a lot of late night Showtime. In Southern Comfort, my characters are frolicking in Texas, but in Eastern Spice (release date May 3, Ellora’s Cave), they embark on a far flung adventure briefly lading in Tokyo, and they in Bangalore, India. I started writing Eastern Spice befo...

Good friends are amazing. I was feeling nervous about an upcoming life change, hesitating on making a choice that seemed frightening, but could make a huge difference in my life. As I stood paralyzed, my good friend gave me an except from The Book of Essenes that compared such life changes and the fear that accompanies them to a series of trapezes. You are content as you swing along on the trapeze you know, so you hesitate on making the leap to the empty trapeze when it appears in front of you, not sure if the new trapeze is a figment of your imagination and certainly terrified of that space in between. In this transition point, you may free fall, but you most certainly grow. My friend was devastated that my choice might put physical distance between us, but she has been in the very same spot herself years ago, and was familiar with the growth such a leap could bring. She “leaned in” and reaped the benefits of doing so, and encouraged me to do the same. Through her tears of separation,...

I go from feast to famine as far as writing is concerned, at least in my head.  First, I’m miles away from any deadline, artificial or otherwise, so there is no real urgency to create anything.  As a result, I spend a lot of time “thinking’ about my story and what the characters are doing.  Then, I’m within days of a deadline on not one, but two projects, but still miles away in terms of word count. If I have done the first thing properly, the ideas will tumble from my head faster than I have to ability to type or can even dictate, and I become a slave to a daily word count goal and there are a lot of late nights. This is where I am now.   I have one book that was due (really) a bit ago, but in my head the deadline is still ten days away.  My characters are still moving around and revealing their motivations and haunting my dreams, generally driving me even more nuts than I am.  (Trust me when I tell you that some of these are pretty unsavory chara...

Yup, I had a book deadline, and my time in the hospital, combined with my usual procrastination (including writing this blog) has left me seriously in danger of being late with this book.  I want to get it done before I get the revision letter for the last one, but that is terribly overdue now, too.  I was expecting them in December, so I could get them any minute. I really can’t afford to be late as I have a Nina Foxx deadline about 4 weeks after this one is done. I know I shouldn’t complain as some writers have no deadlines at all, other than those they impose on themselves.  The book I’m working on is third in a series for Cynnamon Foster.  These are harder to write than anything Nina Foxx has worked on, for some reason.  I don’t know if its because they all take place in a foreign local and I can’t just take a walk or look out the window to orient the characters and instead have to rely on memory or photos I have taken, or if they are taking a long time ...

Editing an anthology has left me feeling like a therapist and a bill collector.  When I wrote my part, I thought I was done but now, after receiving almost all of the submissions I was expecting, I realized I have so much more to write.  I had no idea the project would impact so many people the way it has or that I would find out all the things that I have about my writer-friends.  For them to be so fabulous after all they have experienced makes me respect them that much more.  I feel like a bill collector because there are still a few more submissions that have been promised that I have yet to receive.  I know that everyone has deadlines for much bigger projects, but its time to hound people for their 4000 words now, and I hate that. For some of them, its because they do have a very busy schedule, for others, the delay is because is because I asked them to write about a hard subject that they are not ready to face.  Creative non-fiction is like that. ...

I am on the hunt for flat shoes that don't make me cry.  I haven't had any that don't hurt my feet in years.  Even sneakers hurt if I wear them too long.  Either my arch starts to ache, or they hurt around my foot where my toes connect.  I know I am the Empress of the stiletto heel, but I'd like a pair of shoes that I can slip on to walk the dog that don't look like I've had foot surgery, or I can put on to drive that so I won't ruin my heels. The other requirement is that they can't make me feel as if I have flippers.  Too often I feel less confident in flats because they feel as if my feet are flipping along in front of me. I found a pair of simple looking ballet type slippers on sale at gilt.com, but my foot started to scream before they were even in there good, so those suckers are going back. I came across Tieks.  (www.tieks.com).  I'm not an Oprah watcher, so I had no idea they were one of Oprah's favorite things.  They come in tons of ...

If you haven't read it yet, here's something to get you started.  I'm diligently working on Eastern Spice, the next installment in the series, and reminiscing on how my characters met. Just a head's up, it's hot and steamy, but packs a real twist,  so if you don't want to read that kind of stuff, skip now. If you do continue, I promise you will enjoy it.  If you want to read more than is presented here, the book is available at all your book outlets.  You  can ask  your library, your local independent bookseller, or Barnes  and Noble to buy it, or you can get it at any online outlet.  it is also available electronically on Nook, Kindle and IBook. Enjoy. One/Sería I have to face it, I’m dick-whipped.  That could be the only explanation for why I was standing in the doorway of my apartment, wrapped in the sex-smelling sheets off my bed, answering my door while James was still laying in my bedroom, delirious with the aftermath of the g...

     Yesterday, I met a man who was far too young to be as racially ignorant as he seemed to be.   Or maybe he was just ignorant, I’m not sure which.   We had a business appointment, and he was very comfortable with me, so much so that his mouth seemed to have a bad case of the runs.   Though he had moved to California in High school, he professed to be a former New Yorker.   He still wore his New York accent, and it was a thick as if he’d just left there last year.                 As it often happens when I met a New York refugee, we quickly slipped into questioning mode.   I pulled my own accent out of my bag and slipped into it as comfortably as I might my favorite pair of jeans.   After the normal “where did you go to school” and “what part of town did you grown up in” questions, he started to ask the questions that, in other circumstances, gotten him a ton...